Bad timing affecting my salary

I don’t like to think about this (because it frustrates me) or blog about it (because it seems insensitive given the past years economic ravages), but here it is anyway.  I do not feel that I’m being paid in line with my education, experience, and skills.  I got a really nice raise in the spring, but I am still not satisfied.  Why not?

I have over three years of experience, and despite getting really great annual reviews, I’m still suck at “level 1″ employee.  Industry standard is to promote you after 2 years (if you are good enough — and I am!) or to start you at “level 2″ if you have a M.S. degree.  (I have 2/3 of one so far.)  Even though I’m in a higher paying organization and I’m at the high end of level 1 employees, I’m stuck in the wrong pay band.

Why?  Mostly timing.  I switched jobs to move to California after working 1.5 years, so they refused to hire me into “level 2″ due to lack of experience.  Fair enough.

My first annual raises were after being employed roughly 1 month, so obviously no raise was granted.  We had some other discussions towards the end of 2008, and I’d proved myself enough that my manager agreed I should be promoted to “level 2″.  His timeline was “next year”.  I was satisfied that the topic had been covered and we were on the same page.   I was given a high rating and received complimentary reviews from my daily supervisors, so I was confident things would progress smoothly.  (Cue collapse of the world economy.)

It’s been “next year” for 9 months now, and nothing has been mentioned.  Why?  Bad timing.  Things with work got really bad around January, and there was a lot of shuffling and a few layoffs.  I didn’t have a permanent position in hand — it obviously wasn’t the time to be fussing about salary.  Amidst the turbulence, my manger helped me secured a permanent position on what should be a long term stable assignment — exactly what I need to launch me from entry level to a mid level expert.  I’m excited about the development — but I’m still quite frustrated with the pay band I’m stuck in.

I have a mid year review coming up this month, and it should be interesting.  How did I do the first half of the year?  Well, I survived.  Goals were ambiguous to start, then were deviated from anyway due to higher forces out of our control.  At least I should get some fresh ones to work on.  It’ll also be an opportunity to discuss when my promotion will be happening, and if needed, why I have earned it (but since he’s already agreed, I think it is red tape and bureaucracy rather than doubt of merit that is holding it up).

I’m hoping my leap from level 2 to level 3 will be much quicker.  I should get my Masters degree early next year, and if I do well in my new position, I should be in a good position to move up quickly.  But that’s what I thought a year ago too. . .

I guess I”m open to thoughts/advice, but I already know what I plan to do:  Bring it up with my manager and do really really well in my new position.  Which I should be in as you are reading this!

June Gloom

June gloom isn’t just applying to the weather this year. I should already be in my morning commute, but instead, I’m still in bed with wet hair, dreading it.  Now I’ll have to stay later, but at least the sun sets late and I can still go for a run for stress relief.

Work has gotten to the point where I’ve contemplated asking for an unpaid leave of absense until they get stuff for my next assignment sorted out.  Of course, I wouldn’t really do this (and I’m not sure they would let me anyway), and for all I know it could be several months until everything is processed.   I couldn’t take that financial hit if I want to have a wedding.

I am grateful to have a job.  I am grateful to have my job.  I am.  IThere are good things ahead for me — my new position is (I think) exactly what I wanted to be doing all along and lines up with my grad classes perfectly.  It also is (I think) a fairly secure position, but that’s relative to the program I’ve been on, which was (obviously) not so secure.

So good things are ahead, I’m convinced of this.  But I’ve never been this unsatisfied with my job, on a day to day basis.  If I had to give myself advice, I’d say to stay positive, keep on pushing until the end, pretend that people actually care about the results of the next couple weeks.  They don’t — managers have ceased attending our status meetings, so it is just whoever is left (we’ve shrunk by at least half) telling each other our own status.  It’s ridiculous.

And it is so so hard to stay positive.  I think this is one thing I like about being in classes — when work is unchallenging and lame, I could at least focus on my studies and be challenged.

I feel like I’ve been treading in my career — I spent 1.5 years at my first job, and just when I was getting compliments and felt valued, I decided to move to California.  Now, I spent 1.5 years on this job and… well to be honest, the whole time the assignment wasn’t the best fit, though I learned a lot.  I just can’t wait to get into a position and just STAY for a little while.  Long enough to develop, to become valued, to contribute in meaningful ways.

Enough whining.  Have you ever felt like this?  Did you discover any magic remedies to make it better?

Work and Stuff

Things at work are weird.

It is hard to explain without too many details, but basically the work I’m doing every day is most likely going to be put on a shelf and never looked at again when I’m done with it.  Quite unmotivating!  Also, no one knows for certain exactly what date we are supposed to be “done”, so we don’t know how far we have to take this task, and the direction is to “finish something”. But one thing is certain — by July, I better be working on something else, or I’ll get stuck on overhead (or laid off).

I was quite panicky for awhile as things were moving at the usual corporate pace (SLOW) and I had no idea if there were  opportunities for me.  Then in a span of two days, I had two “interview/discussions” about things I might switch to this summer.  I hope one works out, particularly the one that doesn’t increase my commute.  It also sounds like interesting work which would fit quite nicely into my little career plan.

I’m overdue for a “promotion” (promotion is basically just a small title change and salary band change), but recognize now isn’t really the time to be pushing for it.  I got a fairly good raise, but it is somewhat insulting to still be classified as entry level when I’m quite obviously not doing entry level work.  The promotion has been promised for “this year” (my manager said in December), and it comes with a raise.  But first, I should make sure I have a job to do before I should even start to worry about this.  I think my manager thinkin is along the same lines — let’s get everyone assigned, then worry about the other details.

I am not confident enough to start investing in my Roth IRA just yet, but I did (again) increase my 401k from 8% to 10%.  I keep wavering on that.

I can handle it

The thing I love most about writing (including blogging) is it helps me pinpoint things that I don’t always bother to reflect on in my other day to day activities.  In my recession rant, I concluded with this paragraph “I think I do it because of my general lack of confidence in my ability to deal with whatever life may throw at me on the fly.  So I prepare.  I save an emergency fund, I have plans A-F, and I worry.”

As if on cue, Seth Godin’s post showed up in my RSS feed with a concise (as always) argument that panicking is foolish and there is no need for an abundance of caution.  I realized I’ve been living by “Might as well panic” for the past month or so.  And this is the wrong approach.

If my task ends, I need to trust my manager to do what he can to find me a new task.  That’s his job, and he’s working on it!  I have an interview sometime with someone at a different site, but having just moved, it would make my commute about 40 miles.  So, non-ideal, but I can at least consider it.  He also claimed he’s looking at something at this site, but gave me no details yet.  He’s doing his job.  He wants to keep me around.  I wanted a new task anyway, this is just a bit more of a rough transition.

If there seriously is no work at my company for me, I need to trust myself to be able to find other work at a new company.  I need to get over my “woe is me, I just want a stable position for a couple years” and trust that it’ll be good.  Maybe even better.

If I can never ever find a job in my field again (extremely unlikely!) I need to trust that I’ll still be ok.   I’ll do something else.  I’m a quick study, I know how to work hard.  It will be ok.  I can handle it.  I can’t handle EVERYTHING, but most things that have a good chance of happening, I can handle.

Caution is ok, and if suspending my ROTH IRA for a couple months helps me sleep, I’ll do it.  But all the rest of the worry is totally un-actionable.

I’ve initiated several major changes in my life.  It has always been a little scary at first, but it has always turned out for the better.  When change is initiated by someone else, it is even more scary. But that doesn’t mean it won’t still be for the better.  Change is ok, and it is inevitable.  I better work on learning that now, because I have a lot of living left to do.

I’m so over this recession

I haven’t said much on this, but I haven’t exactly been subtle either.  There are going to be layoffs at my job again.  Not officially, but it is pretty evident what is coming, the questions are “how many?”, “when?” and “who?”.  The task I’ve been on is ending mid-summer, and we are all looking to find something new to keep us gainfully employed.

I went through a phase of anger at the economy and feeling indignant that I might get laid off.  I highly doubt I’m in the bottom X% of the company, but if your task ends, it isn’t so likely they are going to lay off some other worker who has a task, even if they aren’t quite as good.  But I’ve mostly moved out of my mopey phases and into action mode.  Though, still slipping back into mopey on occasion.

The good news (if you can call i that) is that my manager forecasts that layoffs will happen in August (with 60 day notices coming right up in June).  So there is some time.  But not a lot of time.

Here are my current possibilities

1. Internal position at/near where I currently work:  There really aren’t many right now, and I’m not the only one who is gunning for this, but there is a chance.  This would be the ideal situation.  Supposedly I’m being considered for one and am supposed to be contacted, but… I haven’t been contacted. Maybe they realized that my job experinece isn’t what they want?
2. Internal position a somewhat crappy commute away from where I currently live.
3. External position near where I currently live/work.
4. External position + crappy commute
5. Collect unemployment until one of the above options pans out
6. If timing is perfect, take 10 weeks off (unpaid) and complete my M.S. (paid) in one very stressful quarter.  Then, try 1-4 again.  (I don’t think timing will work for this though.)

My ultimate career goal right now (besides the M.S. degree) is to get into a position involving the skills I want to develop and stay there a minimum of 2 years, long enough to become an expert, a capable leader, and to determine if I want to go for an MBA.  But if that isn’t possible, then what?

Given option 2 and 3  both, I’m not sure which I prefer.  Driving further would be a pain, and I’d probably try to move back to this site as soon as possible–which isn’t optimal.  But neither is starting new at another company.  Assuming a new company is even hiring.  Our closest competitor is facing similar layoffs and I have a few friends there who are worried themselves.

I have a habit of jumping to negative conclusions and preparing for the worst case scenario.  I doubt that is the best strategy.  I think I do it because of my general lack of confidence in my ability to deal with whatever life may throw at me on the fly.  So I prepare.  I save an emergency fund, I have plans A-F, and I worry.  I try to put on a brave face, but it is difficult and scary.  I just want to keep my job.

Worried Enough to make some adjustments

Despite trying to remain confident and calm, I’m worried enough about possible job shuffling that I’m taking precautions.

I mentioned awhile ago that I dropped my 401k from 12% back to 8% (minimum to get the full match).  This was not due to job worries, but other plans in the next 12 months or so that led me to believe we might need the extra cash now rather than in 40 years.  And if not, I could always jack up my 401k to 20% or something later in the year.

Paranoid Asteroid asked for opinions on whether she should drop her 401k from 20% to stockpile more cash, and I suggested cutting (temporarily) Roth IRA contributions first because those could be “made up” more easily.

When I started to get anxious about my job situation, I thought, “hmmm, maybe I should take my own suggestion.”  So, instead of having $160 out of each paycheck automatically deposited into my Roth IRA, I’m only having $25.

The net result of all my recent changes is this:  Previously about $1000 was going into my 401k (including match) and $360 was going into a Roth IRA each month.  Now just under $800 is going into my 401k and $50 is going into my Roth IRA.  This is a significant drop, and I’m reluctant to do so in this (supposedly) “on sale” stock market.  Emotional or not, I want the extra cash in my bank account.

If everything goes as smoothly as I anticipate it to (I remain gainfully employed all year and things settle down), I’ll make up my Roth IRA 2009 contributions before April 15th, 2010.  If not, I’ll be glad to have the extra cash.

Tell Me Something Good

I’ve not really been “feeling” the blogging lately.  Besides realizing that most of my blog ideas can fit into 140 characters (thus, I just Twitter them), things have not been good lately.  When things are not good, I like to quietly gather my thoughts and try to figure out how I can make them good again.  And, you know, I still haven’t figured it out.

I can muster up lists of expenses, monthly goals, and net worth calculations. I just about killed the whole “yay, I have a new apartment!” topic.  I’d apologize, but there are a million blogs out there, and I’m not going to pretend that anyone is sitting at my blog page incessantly hitting refresh waiting for new content to appear.

Whether or not I should be (logically, I deduce “no”… or “maybe”.  Emotionally, I come up with “yes!!!”), I’m terrified of getting laid off in the next 1-6 months.  Though I did the math, and it will be ok no matter what, I am the kind of girl who likes a sense of security.  Even if it is a false one.

Mostly due to that alone (but also due to school, moving, and general work issues), I’ve been very stressed out the past couple weeks.  Not in that obvious “I want to burst into tears” way, but in this “millions of doubts gnawing at my soul” sort of way.  Which I think is worse, but I’m not really sure.

To change the subject from stress to goodness, I’ll talk about the good things I can think of right now.  When we first started dating, we would play the “Tell me something good” game and talk cloyingly about how great it was to be in love, how amazing life was, and how lucky we were.  I’m sure the conversations would have been naseauting to an observer (not that there were observers), but you know, I could kind of go for some of that “I’m so lucky!” feeling right now.

So, Good Things:

• We’ve got plans to celebrate a friends birthday this weekend with some good good beer.
• Things with T have been nothing but fabulous, and he’s super supportive and helpful and awesome.
• Despite the crazy moving expenses, I’m going to be able to contribute to savings this month (only because of 3 paycheck month and some cash back bonus, but still).
• Plane tickets are so ridiculously cheap that I might be able to sneak back home to see my family this summer/fall for under $200.  I had a ticket booked for $50 (round trip, no joke!), but the site crapped out, had an inventory error, and I gave up.
• My little nephew is all potty-trained.
• I have a new apartment even closer to the beach than I was before.
• I have a dishwasher.
• I have a bedroom with a door and more than one kitchen cabinet to store my food.  Even the silverware drawer seems spacious!
• It is Friday!  Even if I have a lot of school work to do this weekend, it is still the weekend!
• My dad, who has been affected by the recession the past couple months, told me he has not one, but two, job offers.
• I have a nice bottle of Pinot Nior sitting on my wine shelf.
• I’ll be done taking classes for my M.S. by the end of this year.
• Maybe next weekend, we can go camping.  If not, we probably can at least go for a good hike.
• No matter what happens, I’ve spent 2.5 years living carefully and it will be ok.

So, your turn.  Tell me something good!

Worst Case

I have a feeling the layoffs will be hitting my company again in the near-ish future.  Will I be “safe”?  Well, I think so.   My manager seems to be on my side, my “ratings” were really good, my skills are somewhat diverse…  Blah, blah blah.  I don’t know, when layoffs happen, the worst case seems to be something like 10% of the workforce at a time.  I don’t think my performance or skill set is in the bottom 10% (or even 25%) of what my company needs. But I don’t know that for sure.  I think most people who are laid off don’t see it coming.

So yeah, I think I’ll be safe, yet I can’t help to take stock of the worst case scenario.

• If I get laid off, I get a 60 day notices and some (very minimal since I’ve only been here 1 year) severance pay
• In California, I qualify for $450/week in  unemployment.  While a fraction of what I make now, it is enough to help out.  I figure a good chunk of this would go towards some sort of COBRA health payments.
• Starting in June, I’ll pay only $900/mo in rent (opposed to $1425).  If needed, T could pay up to $1000 and I could pay as little as $600.
• My efund is roughly at 8 months.  And I could obviously use my car fund and any other random cash I have lying around.
• The job market is extremely tight, but I think there are some jobs out there.  There is a lot of competition, I might have to drive further than I’d like.  But there are some jobs out there for skilled workers.  (Right??)

So that is the worst case, and the worst case doesn’t look all that bad.  In this economy, it is certainly possible that it will take some time to find a job.  And that is scary, and it sucks.  I’ve never been an adult in a recession, and the only times I was job seeking was when I was in pretty high demand.  So the worst case is scary, but everything should still be ok.

I don’t think it’ll come to that, and I hope it doesn’t, but this is the part where I thank the SP of 2-3 years ago for starting up an E-fund when times were good, and the SP of about 1 year ago for deciding to focus even more on cash savings.

Budget Tweaks

First, the “Make Work Pay” stimulus went into affect, netting me roughly $40/mo.  Though I think my state taxes are going to take that away pretty quickly?  Oh sunny coast, what price must I pay for you?

Second, my company went ahead with raises despite the economy (and imminent layoffs!), and mine was better than anticipated.  Many people seemed happy after walking out of mangers’ offices, so… Who knows?  I’m totally happy with my raise, but I’m still unsure whether I’m being paid an amount that is on par with those of similar education/experience.   There is such a culture of secrecy about salaries!

From internet research, it seems I’m fairly compensated, but from what T said his friend was recently offered at a similar company (with M.S. complete), I’m less sure.  The company provided salary tables just don’t say enough — a ~40k range from minimum to maximum!??  Gee, thanks.  I wish everyone would walk around with post-its on their foreheads stating their salaries.  Not only would that be useful, it’d be funny.

Anyway.

Spending tweaks: There are a couple categories I’ve been wanting to increase, and the most luxurious change of all is increasing the misc fund by $25.  Yeah, I know, going wild, right?  I’m hoping to have leftovers in this fund regularly.

• Entertainment:  $50 to $60
• Home budget:  $20 to $30 (after laundry and home supplies, I rarely have much left)
• Misc fund:  $100 to $125 (towards whatever!)

Savings tweaks: I go back and forth on what “fund” to put my money in, but honestly, it really makes little difference for my longer term stuff.  I’ll just continue on allocating that how I please, with my two highest priorities being the efund and car fund, even if my budget claims there is a fixed amount towards each goal.  The overall savings will go up, pretty much by the difference of the raise (minus the $45 in spending, minus taxes).

I’ ve been going back and forth on raising my 401k by 2% (roughly $80/mo take home, it seems).  For now, I’m keeping it, but… we’ll have to see.  Thoughts?

Bad Advice for Graduating Seniors

Bad Advice for Graduating Seniors: Find a job you love!

On the surface this advice seems fine and inspiring, but I really hate hearing it.  Your job shouldn’t kill your soul, but even for those of us who generally like their jobs…. love is  a pretty strong word.  There’s not a job on earth that I would love so much that I’d want to do it 40 hours a week, at least one that would pay me at all.

If I “did what I loved” I’d (currently) go on backpacking/hiking trips, take up some more outdoor stuff, and read/write all the time.   Maybe be a vagabond?  But I’d hate my life because I’d be stressed about the lack of security/stability (and food, because I’d be broke).  I certainly wouldn’t want to attempt to make a career of it, even of travel writing, because it just isn’t in me.

I don’t (currently) have an entrepreneurial spirit, so I tire of advice to start our own businesses doing what we love. That isn’t for everyone.   My passions seem to shift, I like to try a little of this and that.  I don’t have one overarching passion that I want to focus my life on

Better Advice:  Create a Life You Love

There are people for which the two are inseparable, and they will have a miserable life if they can’t do follow their passions in the form of a career.  But there are other ways to have a great life.

I really like keeping my stable (well… stable-ish) career as a foundation of security and mental challenge.  I like that it typically only demands 40 hours a week, and will pay for any class I feel like taking.  While my career isn’t my passion (unless this is a job interview), I generally like it and have a strong desire to succeed in it

Do I love my life?  Well, not always, but often!  Each day, I am working towards creating the life I want as best as I can

Honestly, I probably shouldn’t be going on a camping trip this weekend, but I also know that I can’t put things off until “later”, “when I’m done with school” or “when we have more time”.  If I get an A- (or even a B+!) in my class, it won’t deter me from the life I want, but if I constantly push everything fun until “later”, it will.

Rather than expecting your job to fufill you and make you happy, think about a complete life that will make you happy.

What do you think?