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I consider myself reasonably successful, and I hope to continue down the road to success as I get older. Trent over at the The Simple Dollar recently wrote an interesting post in which he shares some tips to improve your life. In light of this, I want to share with you exactly how I got to where I am today, and outline how you can do even better than I did! Here are the main four things I did right to get where I am today:

Luck: I was born in the USA, lucky me! I think that is the single most important thing to my success (though other first world countries could have been acceptable).

Family: We were not in poverty, though there were some money issues at times. That helps a heck of a lot when trying to get through life. I was well fed and even went to a private high school. Most of all, there was a ton of emotional support. My dad in particular placed high priority on education, as he did not finish college himself. We were encouraged to participate in extra-curricular activities, and my parents shelled out for a lot of lessons, sports and extra classes. I used to go to summer school for fun to take extra classes in math, English, art, or whatever else.  My parents also provided some minor monetary support in college, and allowed me to stay at home rent free while for a couple semesters.

Natural ability: Not everyone can get through the hard science coursework with good grades. I’m not meaning to be arrogant–there are a ton of things that I stink at. However, my ability to understand math is genetic–I did nothing special to earn it.

Hard work: I have spent many many hours investing in my education and myself. It isn’t always fun, but it is rewarding.

To a lesser degree, the following two things helped:

Federal Support: I received scholarships and financial aid to attend college. Without it, I’d be at least 20k more in student loan debt. For a state school!

Social connections: I got the interview for my current job because my boyfriend was going to a top grad school, met someone who worked here, and passed on my resume. Most people who work here are from big name schools. Not I! Other than that, I haven’t got a lot of advantages from social connections yet. My parents don’t have powerful friends, nor did I go to a prestigious school. However, this can be a huge factor.

Based in my successes, I have three surefire tips for success. You’ll may have to combine these with hard work to guarantee success. Still, with just a little work, you’ll have a good shot at a successful life if you do these three things:

1. Be born in a good country. Even better, pick a good neighborhood, and maybe consider avoiding being a minority group. You could even consider being male, though I wasn’t and don’t want to be!
2. Have a good family. The more money the easier it will be for you, but even more importantly, they have to care about you. Not only that, they must have the time and knowledge to invest in your future, as well as the ability to lead you along in your early years (and maybe in your young adult years too, if you are lucky).
3. Be gifted. Intelligence is a good gift to have, or perhaps extreme artistic talent. Both would be great, but there are some other options I’m sure. Have some charisma and a go-getter personality.  Be super talented at sports (and also highly disciplined).  While you are at it, make sure you are healthy and it wouldn’t hurt to be attractive too.

What, you don’t like my advice? Okay, okay… Then I suggest you read Trent’s good advice that can actually be followed, no matter what has happened with my three tips!

All joking aside, hard work is very important and can help a lot of people. What about “working smart”? Personally, that term gets on my nerves. I think it is overused and largely meaningless. However, if you think you can find a way to “work smart”, go for it. If you don’t really understand what “work smart” means in your life (I don’t!) just work hard while you are contemplating it.

My point is, you do have to play your cards right, but it is silly to pretend we all got a similar hand.

I do not come from a wealthy family. My parents do alright–a nurse and an electrician–but probably lean more towards working class than middle class. I’m from the Midwest, and a chunk of my relatives are from a small town (about 20,000 people) in a relatively unpopulated typical Midwestern state. We went back to visit for the hoidays this year, and apparently my dad had been talking about my new job with his relatives.

Aunt: So, the big move is coming up! You are going to be a California girl! Did they give you a large enough starting salary?
Me: Yeah, I think it should be enough. It is expensive there, but I’ll be okay.
Aunt: Oh yeah…. Well your dad was just saying that he didn’t think that they gave you enough. With the rent increase and all.
Me: :::awkward silence::: No, no… It should be enough. I mean, where I live now is really cheap, but I’ll be able to afford to live there.

In this blog, I have no problems stating how much I’m making. Yet this conversation with my aunt made me extremely uncomfortable for a couple reasons. First, it is someone I know in real life, and I’m not anonymous. I don’t particularly like sharing salary information with friends and family. However the biggest reason was the particular audience. My aunt is in her late thirties and is a substitute teacher. She has a 5 year old son which she raises, though the father is still somewhere in the picture. I don’t know how much money she might make in a given year, but I would venture it’s roughly 1/3 of my new salary. Maybe less.

When I got my first job, my dad shared the exact numbers with his family, probably only because he was so proud. After that, I asked him not to discuss my salary with his relatives, and I don’t think he gave exact numbers this time. He’s just a talker, and he’s proud of me. Besides, what she was saying is partially true. The salary increase just barely offsets the rent increase, and with taxes and other expenses, I’m probably coming out slightly behind. I don’t resent that. There is some price to pay for perfect weather and the great nature, being blocks from the ocean. There is a price to pay for not having to scrape ice off my windows and wear three layers of pants. But it isn’t as though I’ll be struggling.

I think each generation hopes that the next will be better off than them. At the same time, it might be difficult for them to see without some twinge of envy, even if they truly are proud.