I’ve had more than one person recently joke about T living off my salary while he finishes his PhD. Despite the fact that it is okay for one partner to financially support the other for whatever reasons they want (and really, why do I care?), I always feel the need to correct them.
He’s on a fellowship that is enough to live on, plus he does freelancing on the side that pays at ~$100/hr (he’d never do it full time — too boring). You don’t get your PhD for the money — it’s not financially the best choice in most cases. You get it because you want to do the type of work that requires a PhD.
However, that doesn’t mean it has to be a money suck. Not that he tracks it, but I’m sure his net worth has gone up, despite being a grad student in a very expensive state and buying me a ring. He has no student loans, cash savings, and some retirement savings. He’s responsible, and no, he’s not living off my earnings. (Or his parents either, as some of his relatives imply with questions.)
So it isn’t true!
Which isn’t exactly the point. The point is, why do people even comment on it in the first place? And why do I feel the need to correct them?